Pam Halter
Writing Editing Serving

Parents Blog

Happy 22nd Birthday, Anna!
5/15/2013 6:48:55 AM by: pam

 

Happy 22nd Birthday, Anna! I can't believe you're such a lady already. It's hard because you're still a child in your mind. Mommy and Daddy love you and we know you love us back. It's such a blessing to get a hug from you, to know you love us, too.

With each passing birthday, I can't help but wonder what you would be doing if you weren't autistic. I often dream of your aspirations, goals, and accomplishments. You'd be graduating from college this year. Maybe you'd have a serious boyfriend. You'd be best friends with your sister, Mary, and your brother, Scott. And you'd be so proud of your niece and nephew. We'd be getting ready to move you to an apartment someplace wherever you got a job. You'd be so excited to be on your own! We'd give you advice and you'd say, "I'll be okay, Mom and Dad!"

I imagine you'd be doing theatre and singing and dancing. Maybe going on short term mission trips and having great compassion for orphans and the elderly.

You have such love and life in you now - I know you'd be a force to reckon with if you weren't hindered!

Today, I will try not to grieve the loss of a normal child, but my heart hurts with all the "what ifs" and I can't help but weep for myself. You have no idea, sitting there playing with your toys and watching Willy the Sparrow (your latest favorite.) And I know you'll cheer when I show up with pizza at your program at lunchtime.

In spite of everything, all that I wish were different, I still love you.  My shuggey bear. Happy Birthday!


Comments

pam From At 5/15/2013 1:35:22 PM

Yes, Lord Jesus, come quickly!!

Julie Ann Monzi From Gettysburg, PA At 5/15/2013 11:26:03 AM

You made me cry, Pam. I try not to indulge in the ""what ifs"", but they happen anyway, don't they? Maybe the answer is still one day at a time. I have an essay somewhere (don't know who wrote it) entitled ""Just for Today."" I'll have to look for it.

jenny From PA At 5/15/2013 10:27:40 AM

Crying with you.... Heaven looks so, so glorious today... ""in the twinkling of an eye""...

Previous Posts

The Power of Doritos
5/7/2018 12:00:00 PM  by: pam

Yay For Friends!
1/9/2018 3:15:00 PM  by: pam

Show You!
9/11/2017 12:58:00 PM  by: pam

Happy? 26th Birthday, Anna
5/15/2017 7:37:00 AM  by: pam

Re-grouping
3/14/2017 8:10:00 AM  by: pam

We can relate!
9/1/2016 8:00:00 AM  by: pam

A Little Fall Fun
10/18/2015 8:04:11 AM  by: pam

Going Commando
10/5/2015 6:37:04 PM  by: pam

So Behind
9/22/2015 8:42:33 AM  by: pam

Stares and Storytime
4/12/2015 7:12:46 AM  by: pam

Big Big Changes
3/27/2015 9:12:27 AM  by: pam

Blog Post on Autism
9/22/2014 7:30:14 AM  by: pam

The Power of Pets
9/12/2014 4:21:44 PM  by: pam

Depression's Demands
8/15/2014 2:19:26 PM  by: pam

Do We or Don't We?
8/4/2014 12:00:01 AM  by: pam

Falling Down
6/22/2014 1:36:52 PM  by: pam

Research Study
5/23/2014 12:48:08 PM  by: pam

Who goes? Who stays?
5/19/2014 12:11:51 PM  by: pam

Being Thankful
4/25/2014 7:37:26 AM  by: pam

Excellent Article
4/7/2014 7:03:09 AM  by: pam

Jury Duty and Holland
3/27/2014 7:36:35 AM  by: pam

I Confess
3/17/2014 8:11:55 AM  by: pam

The Dreaded Medication Change
3/4/2014 12:49:56 PM  by: pam

Keeping It Together - part seven
2/24/2014 1:03:18 PM  by: pam

Keeping it Together - part six
2/10/2014 8:20:16 AM  by: pam

A Milestone Day
2/3/2014 8:13:17 AM  by: pam

Keeping it together - part five
1/21/2014 6:43:18 AM  by: pam

Keeping It Together - part four
1/3/2014 7:56:02 AM  by: pam

Keeping it Together - part three
12/16/2013 7:34:46 AM  by: pam

Keeping it Together - part two
12/9/2013 6:30:25 AM  by: pam

Keeping it Together - part one
12/5/2013 8:00:03 AM  by: pam

Catching Up
11/13/2013 8:22:00 AM  by: pam

The Perfect House
10/25/2013 8:06:56 AM  by: pam

Another Mom in the Mix
10/7/2013 3:11:58 PM  by: pam

Grieving the Loss
9/24/2013 8:39:13 AM  by: pam

Great article
9/11/2013 1:06:06 PM  by: pam

This and That
9/9/2013 4:09:18 PM  by: pam

Fun in the ER
8/30/2013 9:17:32 AM  by: pam

Bless me, Anna!
8/14/2013 1:51:41 PM  by: pam

Talk to me, Anna!
8/8/2013 5:04:30 PM  by: pam

God's Will
7/30/2013 3:13:08 PM  by: pam

Update on Anna's bloodwork
7/24/2013 6:31:05 AM  by: pam

Stirring the Cesspool
7/11/2013 6:27:11 AM  by: pam

Vacation and Other Fun Stuff
7/3/2013 5:46:28 AM  by: pam

A Day at the Beach
6/17/2013 8:05:05 AM  by: pam

Anna's Surgery Experience
6/5/2013 12:03:49 PM  by: pam

No Place For Anna
5/26/2013 8:27:52 AM  by: pam

Painful Gifts
5/21/2013 8:56:57 AM  by: pam

Happy 22nd Birthday, Anna!
5/15/2013 6:48:55 AM  by: pam

A Rough Day
5/6/2013 6:18:44 AM  by: pam

Things I've Learned - part five
4/30/2013 8:02:08 AM  by: pam

Things I've Learned - part four
4/22/2013 6:51:41 AM  by: pam

Things I've Learned - part three
4/15/2013 6:14:06 AM  by: pam

Things I've Learned - part two
4/9/2013 7:40:11 AM  by: pam

Interview with Terri Groh
4/5/2013 5:44:08 AM  by: pam

Things I've Learned - part one
4/3/2013 7:55:42 AM  by: pam

The Things People Say - part eight
3/27/2013 6:06:08 AM  by: pam

Comparisons
3/18/2013 8:06:43 AM  by: pam

Why Is It A Blessing?
3/11/2013 6:24:04 AM  by: pam

Tim's Place
3/8/2013 11:57:02 AM  by: pam

New Medication Worries
3/5/2013 6:38:36 AM  by: pam

A Night Out for Anna
2/25/2013 11:29:44 AM  by: pam

Play it again, Sam
2/20/2013 5:47:32 AM  by: pam

Happy Birthday
2/15/2013 5:32:13 AM  by: pam

The Anna Bowl
2/4/2013 8:01:33 AM  by: pam

The Queen of Babble-on
1/30/2013 12:45:36 PM  by: pam

Really, people?
1/25/2013 7:36:11 AM  by: pam

Cold Feet
1/23/2013 7:55:46 AM  by: pam

Hearing God
1/15/2013 6:58:57 AM  by: pam

Running Away
1/10/2013 11:19:00 AM  by: pam

Post-Christmas-Reentry-Syndrome
1/4/2013 6:49:36 AM  by: pam

Emmanuel, God With Us
12/17/2012 6:51:08 AM  by: pam

Take Heart
12/7/2012 4:42:07 AM  by: pam

Jumping in the Leaves
11/27/2012 5:56:16 AM  by: pam

Being Thankful
11/19/2012 7:02:07 AM  by: pam

Patience and Love and Wretchedness
11/13/2012 7:38:47 AM  by: pam

A Typical Halter Vacation
11/8/2012 8:35:45 AM  by: pam

Is This Really My Life?
11/1/2012 5:21:04 AM  by: pam

Frankenstorm
10/27/2012 4:22:45 PM  by: pam

A Small Victory at Anna's Program
10/24/2012 7:21:36 AM  by: pam

Update on the problem at Anna's program
10/22/2012 8:23:51 AM  by: pam

The Fight Goes On
10/19/2012 4:55:06 AM  by: pam

Fighting the Good Fight
10/18/2012 7:01:44 AM  by: pam

Sit down, Anna
10/16/2012 6:44:47 AM  by: pam

The Things People Say - conclusion
10/15/2012 8:32:45 AM  by: pam

The Cloaking Device
10/12/2012 6:22:27 AM  by: pam

The Things People Say - part seven
10/11/2012 5:56:56 AM  by: pam

The Things People Say - part six
10/10/2012 5:35:53 AM  by: pam

The Things People Say - part five
10/9/2012 6:59:06 AM  by: pam

The Things People Say - part four
10/4/2012 6:00:52 AM  by: pam

The Things People Say - part three
10/3/2012 6:09:22 AM  by: pam

The Things People Say - part two
10/2/2012 5:29:13 AM  by: pam

The Things People Say - part one
10/1/2012 7:52:27 AM  by: pam

Godzilla Lives at my House
9/27/2012 6:58:41 AM  by: pam

The Early Bird Gets Eaten
9/26/2012 5:22:30 AM  by: pam

Over and Over Again
9/25/2012 5:15:50 AM  by: pam

What Good Are Seizures?
9/21/2012 11:48:29 AM  by: pam

Why Me?
9/20/2012 8:37:32 AM  by: pam

The Rest of my Life?
9/19/2012 5:47:36 AM  by: pam

Feelings
9/18/2012 1:23:56 PM  by: Pam